Relationships are fun, provide support, and at times take work.

When two people come together in a relationship, there are good and bad times regardless of being gay, straight, or trans. In an ideal world, our relationship would be devoid of conflict and provide us with a sense of security, inclusion and unconditional love.  As the perfect world does not exist, relationships will inevitably produce conflict at some point.

Same sex couples face many challenges that heterosexual couples do not.  This may come from fear of being judged, or rejected by family, friends, co-workers or strangers. Disapproval by family members and society can lead to isolation and issues with communication in the relationship.

Communication is key in any relationship, but may be more important with same sex couples. Homosexual relationships do not have the usual socially constructed gender roles; therefore it is vital for each person to communicate their wants and needs in a relationship.

Talk with your significant other openly about where you’re both at with public displays of affection. One person in a relationship may not be out and open regarding their sexual orientation, and being respectful of their boundaries is important. It may also be beneficial to share your own “coming out” story and what that was like for you. Coming out is an individual process that allows you to live authentically able to love yourself and who you are. Problems in a same sex relationship can escalate if one person is out and the other is not. Being supportive is important; reassure your partner that you will stand by them. During this process, it might help to reach out to your local LGBT support group.

I offer same sex couples counseling to navigate issues such as:

• Help with communication and establishing a healthy, secure, and emotional connection.
• Creating a healthy foundation in your relationship that includes healthy boundaries, self-care, and intimacy.
• Help with typical relationship issues, sexual issues, working through public displays of affection, stress management, and learning to be vulnerable with each other.
• Support as an unbiased third party on how to deal with your emotions in a relationship, with regard to understanding and respecting the differences in each other.
• A clear, non-judgmental approach to navigating relationship issues.
• Learn to be committed to each other in the relationship and enhance your communication.
• Understand each other’s values and what that looks like in your relationship.

My job is not to tell you what to do, or how to live.  I can help you understand yourself and your partner on a deeper level. Through therapy you will learn what a healthy relationship looks like and how to communicate your wants and needs to your partner.